Balance and Harmony

John Duns Scotus taught that the perfection of a moral act was not to be found by pushing it as far as possible on the "selfless" scale (which is the form of morality that has largely formed the West, and almost everybody reacts against because it is impossible 99.9 percent of the time). With his usual subtle wisdom, he says that the perfection of a moral act is to find the proper balance between the focus inward and focus outward, which he calls the "two natural affections" or metaphysical desires. Satan's fall, he taught, was not merely self-love, a certain degree of which is required and necessary, but disordered self-love! How different the history of Christian morality could have been, if we had only been taught this. It is balancing love of self with love of the other that makes for moral integrity, just as in true love making. It is holding my own boundaries, while also going beyond them for the sake of the other.

The issue, as the East and most Native religions have always intuited, is to seek harmony and balance instead of mere obligation and moral requirement. Most people would be willing to try that, whereas this "total selflessness" ideal only backfires and ends up ironically making many Christians actually quite selfish. Basically, they give up on the gospel, thinking it is asking them to be martyrs every minute.

Richard Rohr; From Wild Man to Wise Man, Reflections on Male Spirituality